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Sunday 12 December 2010

Hatred!

I don't know why, but somehow I come to hate this one person. She's a close friend I guess. I can't explain the hatred I have towards her and how it became stronger each time. She's not a bad person, I know that but it is because of her attitude that makes me crazy. I shouldn't feel this way because it's not right. She's my friend for god sake. Nobody's perfect right? So I should have just ignore it. Hmm, why do I have this feeling? I hate it. There is something wrong with me. I feel like there is darkness inside of me. Nowadays I often stress out of something stupid, I become lazier than ever, I refuse to do any work, I often get mad that makes me feel like I want to hit or kill somebody. Shit!!! What is wrong with you ATIQAH??? Get a grip! Oh god, help me!

Thursday 2 December 2010

The most boring sem break ever!!!

This holidy is the worst i ever had!!!
No money, no car, nothing to do, no where to go...
Argh, I never thought that it would turn out this way...
My MP4 is broken...
What else???
So tired of it all...
Stress out...
I don't know what to do...
Arghhhh, what a life~

Wednesday 10 November 2010

Think before you do...

It hurts. Your attitude is just unacceptable...
No matter how much we fight, it has never get serious...
We both curse at each other...
That I can understand... We say something that we didn't mean...
But this is serious. You broke my heart when you say "aku harap ko tdo bwat selame2nye". Better watch out, you might get it... Old people say "kata2 itu adalah doa". Thank you so much for everything... If your wish comes true, I would like to say congratulation to you in advance my dear...

Monday 1 November 2010

Finals~ unexpected surprise!!!

First of all I would like to say that I'm quite relax this sem compare to last semester because the subject isn't as hard as last sem. So most of my carry mark is above average. I was so glad and hoping to get deans list diz sem. However, never would i imagine that the final exam paper was as hard as this. I've gone through most of the past sem paper and I swear to god that I can answer all of it from the calculation part to the theory part. I was so frustrated because, I don't think I could achieve my target. Hmmm, I was so confident at first that I can get A's for most of the subject,unfortunately I don't have it anymore since this final has bring so much surprises. My first paper was costing, it was so hard, I was so shocked that it was that hard, so I checked the code twice to make sure that was taking the right paper. How I wish I was wrong. Damn it... Its the right code! I cried later that day knowing that its going to be tough for me to get an A for that subject. I was so down... So, I try to think positive. I try to cover up my mistakes at costing by studying hard for the next paper which is account. The lecturer said it was easy, most of our senior got an a for that subject and no one have fail for that paper before. True, I look through the past sem paper and the exercises that our lecturer has given us, it was easy I tell you!!! But by the time i sit for the paper, ****!!! I think you can guess what happen and how was the paper... Hmm, now what??? When i finished answering and the "pengawas" has collect the paper, I look at my friend who was sitting next to me, at first I wanted to cry, but somehow when I saw his face all i can do is laugh! Hahaha, he kinda got the highest carry mark among us, and he too admit that it was hard. So I feel a bit relief that i'm not the only one who can't answer it.

Monday 27 September 2010

I hate the way you lie...

Just gonna stand there watch me burn,
no! Its not alright because i don't like the way it hurts...
Just gonna stand there hear me cry,
no! Its not alright because I hate the way you lie,
I HATE the way you LIE!!!

Thursday 19 August 2010

Tiresome~

Oh god, it will be a very tiring week for us students.
So many tests and quizzes.
I'm thinking how to coop with this.
Damn stressing. Study till midnight is not really an option
anymore because I get scared and i become more stressful to see others can sleep while I can't. I don't want to burn the midnight oil anymore.
I get restless whenever I did it.
Usually if i stay up late, I will cover back my sleeping time the next day.
However, this time I can't.
How am I suppose to do that when there's a test too on the next day?
This Sunday I have a test on accounting information system,the next day would be oral test, and on Friday I'll will be sitting for quizzes on corporate finance and also a test for Law. Hmm,somehow I wonder how do those DL students study. The same courses, the same exam, and at the same time... Yet, they could excel!!!
Common tiqs, you know you can. I just have to put more effort in it.
That's a problem with me, the lazy bum! v(^^,)

Sunday 15 August 2010

Burden...

Caring for someone too much can be a burden to you.
Especially when that person doesn't realise how much u care.
I love this one guy so dearly. I am always worried about him.
Especially if he doesn't contact me for a whole day, because that
would be very odd. He always calls me everyday, and also text me whenever
he can't. Somehow, yesterday he did not text me at all, nor did he call me.
I tried to call him, but his phone was off.
I was worried sick!!! I asked his brother and sister whether they know his whereabouts. But neither of them replied. I was scared if anything bad had happen. I wanted to cry then. I can't sleep all night thinking about him.
Later this morning, I try contact him again, but I couldn't reach him.
It was frustrating. Few hours later, he called me. I asked him where did he go and why didn't he text me. He acted as if nothing happen and that i was worried over nothing! That really irritates me. It is not a small thing!!! All I wanted to know is that you are safe laa you dummy!!!

Thursday 12 August 2010

Reasons....

I've just read an interesting blog. She is a good writer.
I like the way she write, so smooth.
The language that she use is so beautiful.
I really wish that i could write like that.
However, there is one of her post that I don't really like.
She wrote about the reasons for her creating the blog.
The reason she write. Like all the other blogger, she wish to
share her experience, her opinion on certain issues.
When i first start reading it, I thought it was cool.
But then, she criticize other people's blog. That's when I started to lose
interest. She keep on criticizing about those who writes about their feelings,
emotions, friendship.... How she hated them. It was so arrogant of her. I don't think that it's the right thing to do. People have their own reason. Not everyone has the same reasons. Take me for example, I write about whatever that i feel like writing.
As you can see, most of my post is about emotions. I create this blog because my BEL lecturer ask me to. It is part of our assignment for that subject. He ask us to write anything, he said "let it be your diary". I don't really like the idea at first. But, I got used to it later and loving it. =) If you don't like what others write, then it's simple. Just leave. You don't have to go on and on saying that their blog suck because blablabla.... So, unprofessional. Not everyone is good at writing, including me. But we are taking a great effort to be better.

Tuesday 10 August 2010

Do not...!!!


Things that you should not do to anyone...
Especially to ME!!!

DO NOT:

1. Underestimate a person.

I assure you that you will regret it because the person who often being underestimated were the one who will shine above all the others.

2. Judge a person before you really get to know her/him and the real situation.

Why must you judge someone based on 1st impression? You should know that 1st impression is not always right. The person that you thought was the devil might actually be the angel. You would be surprise when you know that she/he might be the one that you really need. Furthermore, one bad incident does not prove anything. It might just be a coincidence and he/she might be the victim!

3. Don't cross the line.

You don't know what you're asking for. There's a limit for everything. Once you cross it, there is no turning back!

Dear "friends",
I had enough of your B*******!!! I think it's time to show you guys who I really am. Since you already show me your true nature, I might as well show you mine. Remember this, I can "too" play the game!!! Don't be surprise when you see the results. All you know is being two faces j***! You are a coward. Try to say it infront of our face if you dare. I don't give a damn anymore...

Saturday 7 August 2010

memories~


I just got my laptop fixed...
The person who fixed it told me that almost 80% of the file was corrupted...
My response was... "uhh, okey."
I don't really know so much about computer.
It's not that i don't want to learn, but its just so complicated.
Hmmm, one thing that i do know is that.......
"ALL OF THE PICTURES HAS GONE!!!"
The memories of my friends, my family and all...
Waaaaa!!! Its frustrating!!!
Its so saaaaadddd~ (T_T)

Tuesday 3 August 2010

Almost...

I've got a fever since last friday. My body temperature was high.
I fell so tired and stress.I thought that it would get better the next day.
However, I was wrong!
The next morning, i still got the fever,
but not as high as last night.
I still went to class eventhough I was sick.
After class, I went to McD to have a bite on GCB!!!
It was damn delicious!!!
"I'm lovin it"
Later, I went window shopping with my friends...
I was feeling better at that time.
But, once i got home....
I think you can guess what happen right?
The fever went on and on till this very day.
It has been a week!!!
The most frustrating part of it is that, whenever I went to see the doctor,
my body temperature is normal...
So, the doctor think that i was lying and just wanted to get the MC.
WTF???
I went to two clinic already, and non of them give any good feedback.
Now, not only that i still have the fever,
my body also hurt...
"lenguh badan wey wa cakap sama lue, gare2 batuk+bersin yg kuat"!!!
Nak nages, tak guna...
Aku dah nak give up dah nie!!!
Demam yang yok!!!
The same flu that i got last year, the one which i was quarantine
sebab disyaki H1N1...
Hmm, atleast they gave me antibiotic at that time.
Now they only gave me penadol...

Monday 17 May 2010

Stop being so judgmental!!!


It hurts me a lot when you say that you don't approve him because his stupid! How do you know that he is stupid??? Just by looking at his spm result? Is that how you define stupid? If he is stupid, how can he pass the exam??? Sure he doesn't got straight a's, but he did pass it with all credits. You can never tell whether the person is nothing and useless now. Who knows if he might be a somebody? SPM is not that important. It's a benchmark, you want good results so that you can get into a good University, so that you can continue study. Isn't that the point? He got in! Now tell me, who are you to say that he is stupid and useless??? As far as I know, he is such a brilliant boy. I like him, I trust him, I love him... I don't give a damn of what you say because I know and I believe that he'll prove you wrong. He will become a great man one day. Just you wait.

Thursday 22 April 2010

True love or simply stupidity???


Tell me why you're so hard to forget?
Eventhough you're the one who make things worse,
you're the one who make me cry,
the one who broke my trust,
the one who hurt me the most,
and the one who broke my heart...

Shouldn't i hate you for that?
Shouldn't i despise you after all the things you've done?
Shouldn't i refuse to hear your voice?
Shouldn't i rejected all your calls?
Deleted all your messages?
Wasn't i suppose to avoid from seeing you?
WASN'T I????!!!

So why didn't I?

Why are you still the one that i love?
Why are you still the one that i miss?
The only one that i dreamed of?
Why is it your voice that i wanted to hear?
The one that i wanted to meet?

Why????!!!

And you...
You are the villain in this story....

Shouldn't you ask for my forgiveness?
Shouldn't you fill a bit remorse?
Shouldn't you feel guilty?

Tell me...
Why is it so easy for you to move on?
Why is it so easy for you to smile?
Why is it so easy for you to forget the things that had happen,
the things you've done?
Why were you the one who is happy with someone else beside you?

Why????!!!

Denial...(Sunday, August 23, 2009)


I used to tell myself that i dont need u...
I dont need love...
Its juz burden...
Its juz some sort of obstacle...

But, there r also tymes when i miss u so badly...
When all i want to do is talk to u on da phone 4 hours...
Telling u how much i miss u...
How much i wanted to c u at that tyme...
My heart ache 4 u...

Deep down inside,
i still love u...
Still miss u...
Still want u to be by my side again...
Like the old days...

I never regret the things we've gone through...
I never regret knowg u, though i told u i did once...
The truth is, if i can turn back times...
I wont change anythg...
I will do it all over again, coz i really2 love u...
Always have and always will...

I dont know what to do...
I'm juz too scared to admit to u...
I'm paranoid...

Ur the best thing tat happen in my life...
If i could juz told u tat...
hmmm..... Guess u'll never know...

Friday 2 April 2010

Unexpected surprise~


I just finished two tests for today. Mandarin oral test and accounting. Sigh*
Mandarin was fine, but account was freaking hard. I've never did any exercise that ask that type of question. The type of question that you can't even find in past years exams. I don't think its tricky. Its not tricky, its complicated!!! I don't blame the lecturer for putting that type of question in the test, however, shouldn't they teach us first before asking us to answer it??? How do they expect us to get high carry marks if they do that??? Aaaarrrrrgggghhhhhhhh!!!!

Wednesday 31 March 2010

A friend in need is a friend indeed~


It has been quite some time since i last updated my blog. I have been wanting to write this for quite a while. Its about friendship. The friends that i know, always smile, seems kind and friendly with one another turnout to be not as nice as i think they are. Turns out, most of them are just back stabbers and quite selfish. Put yourself first before others is not a bad thing. Survival of the fittest. First come first serve. Those quote is not wrong, however don't be so cruel. Don't stab your friends back at order to get what you want. That is unethical, like the CRG lecturer would have said. "Niat tidak menghalalkan cara". When they needed something, then they will be nice and friendly to you. Treat you as kind as possible. Those are just Friends For Benefit (FFB). Two faces. How i hate them. Nowadays, its hard for you to differentiate between BFF and FFB. Hmmm, better watch out....

Wednesday 10 March 2010

MEBA's Nyte~




We have a test on the same day. So I kinda looking forward for the dinner to release stress. We rode the bus around 7.30 p.m and arrived at 8. The place was beautiful, I love the way they organize the place. It was fantastic. The first thing we did after arriving was, pray for solat maghrib. Then..... Click*Click*Click!!!
The ceremony started with the arrival of the VIP. As usual, there must be some people giving speeches. But all i heard was.... Bla bla bla... How can I be blame? I was starving to death. The speech lasted long enough till 10 p.m. I haven't ate the whole day just to save some room in my stomach for the dinner that i paid for RM45. I almost got a gastric because of it. What a night. huhuhu (^^,) It was fortunate for me that he food was great. Alls well ends well~

Wednesday 3 March 2010

Say it again~


tqamishu

There are few people a that I am missing so much right now. I haven't seen them for almost a month now. They were the one who always make me smile, cheer me up when i'm down, being there whenever i needed support. Khalid, Eyena, Bou, I really miss you guys. I missed hanging out with you guys, gossiping all night long, watch midnight movies and having slumber party. Bou, I miss going out with you and finding new places to eat. You were always excited when it comes to food! I don't know how and where you put all the foods inside your stomach because you ate a lot! I enjoyed watching you eating (^^,). Eyena, I miss going shopping with you. Haha, both of us have the addiction for shopping. I can't even remember if there were any times where we went back empty handed from any shopping malls. Always plenty of receipts and plastics. Even if we were short of budget, that has never stop us. 'Shopaholic'is the best term for you and me =p.


The three of us always share stories before we went to sleep. You always come to my room just to see how was i doing everyday without a miss. Bou always do something hilarious and funny that makes us laugh like hell!!! Waaa, how I miss those moments.We did everything together, we were practically sisters. Its hard being here without you guys.


As for you Khalid, I miss everything about you. Though you always annoys me, makes me angry, and can be suffocating sometimes, you have never fail making me laugh for a day. Thats what I love the most about you. Though we chat every single day through the phone, it is still not enough. I still miss you. You were the one who see me at my ugliest and love me at my worse.


Melaka is just so far away from home. I miss Shah Alam, where I can go back every week. It's just a couple of miles from KKB and Banting. There are so many interesting things to do there, many places to go. Waaaaaaaa, I want to go home. I can't wait for this semester to end so that i can see the faces of those I love (T_T)

Sunday 28 February 2010

Busy+Study+Hungry+No Money=Moody!!!


It is stressful to be a student especially during test week. I don't know which subject to study 1st. Where to start? Also when there are assignments that we have to submit at the end of the week. Argh, this is pretty hard. All this tense is making me hungry. I'm craving for chocolates!!! Yummy!!! If only i can get some. If i'm not mistaken, according to research chocolates can make people happy. I don't know whether its true or not, but Ferrero rondnoir sure does make me happy (^^,) Its just like Ferrero Rocher only that it used dark chocalate... Hmm, i don't know why but somehow i feel so tired and exhausted for the past few days. I often feel sleepy. Like yesterday, I think I was awake less than 12 hours! I was sleeping all the time. I feel restless. I don't have any appetite. I didn't eat as much as always, I only ate instant mushroom soup at night and thats all i have for the day. Though, its not that bad because i can lose some weight, huhu =p Could it be because of the environment??? The whether is not so good, its freakin hot!!! My eczema is getting worse because of it. All of this happen during test week, how lucky am I???

Saturday 20 February 2010

Going back...

Tomorrow I will go back to Melaka. To be honest, I feel pretty sad about it. Even though it has been a week, somehow I feel like I have only been home for a few days. How time pass by. I don't really want to go back to Melaka. If only I could spend a few more days at home, it would be great. However, I must accept the fact that my holiday is already over. There are tons of work waiting to be done. Next week will be a hectic week for me as there are many tests, quizzes and presentation. I hope i will be able to manage the time brilliantly. Waaaa, stress stress stress!!! Guess I have to burn my midnight oil again. Hehe v(^^,)